Shenmue Dojo

wude wrote: why not, we all care about him

mue 26 wrote: Good heavens, Sonikku! I'm awfully glad you didn't do it, as I don't think I could possibly face the prospect of a dojo without your feminine energy, and level headedness (indeed, there's very, very little of that around here). But please, keep living for the sake of your own marvellous-ness! .

Bluecast wrote: ^ Why I didn't say at first but pete made it public so at that point the cat was out of the bag. I don't know if Henry wanted the subject publicly posted either and was not about to ask either.

Sonikku wrote: I once contemplated suicide. Hell, even now life is and always will be tough with exceptionally little in the way of reprieves. But when my world came crashing down all around me and I had no choice but to stop being in denial over feeling like a woman on the inside, that brought me to a dark place I was not prepared to deal with or preserver through one little bit. Even after being in denial, feeling trapped, like in a prison with no hope for parole or escape very nearly pushed me over the edge. A lot of people think taking your own life is cowardly. It practically means nothing to say you're thinking about it. I hear people say things like that all the time. Ironically I never told anyone, until now, and probably came a lot closer than those that did. Personally, I think it takes an awful lot of nerve to suppress that natural instinct of self preservation and go through with finally pulling the trigger than most would imagine. Ultimately though it's because of cases like this, when everyone you touched in your life loses it in their own downward spiral in the face of your demise that I think I could not see it through.

Henry Spencer wrote: Just wanted to log in to say thanks for all the kind words, it really means a lot. I won't be coming back for the foreseeable future, but all the well wishes definitely encourage me to do so, in time. And it's okay that people know what happened, my apologies for disappearing like that.. I did realise I would be letting down some people on here, since I promised to do certain things for them (Dorian, Mittens, Ryudo, my apologies, I'll pay you guys back one day, bet on it). Also apologies to my fellow staff members (and Dojo forum members) for bailing out like I have, if I could turn back the clock, I would have contacted you guys and the Dojo with what was going on, I feel bad about it.

I also hope ThyDarkAngel is doing fine himself, he's going through with difficulties himself also. If you're reading this, take care of yourself and all the best. Same goes for any of you going through hard times right now. I wish all the best to all of the members on here [for example: Orange (hope you have the best damn wedding there ever is and ever will be) and Kenny (keep on living the dream)] in the future.

Don't want to make a big deal out of my absence, but seeing all of the posts in here, I felt I had to.

I vote Crimson Ryan or Kenny for mod!

I'll always be on PSN or my Hotmail if any of you guys fancy a chat. Sorry if this comes off as pretentious, I was just rather touched by all the nice messages.
You guys and gals are the best there is. See you around (and maybe again, in the future).
Be well.
Henry out.