I win I lose I win you win. I'm not Dave Chappelle

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I win I lose I win you win. I'm not Dave Chappelle

Postby Bluecast » Wed Aug 29, 2012 1:14 pm

I know I'm loved like Martin Luther king loved the KKK. But may I talk?

I said this on two other forums. So here it goes.

Yes you know the details of my health blah blah. Since 2011 up until I quit this past month it was painfully obvious I lost all mojo. I remember any time I left there were a few "Where is Ryudo" topics. It seemed like the place fell apart. So even tho I wanted to take long breaks or even quit much earlier,I felt I could not as I felt this place would fall apart. It drove me crazy and did not help that early on everyone under the sun was made mod when Yama took over. No one talked to each other. Everyone did whatever they wanted. Which obviously led to many heads crashing. My downfall was my choice to stay on even tho I knew I wanted to leave and knew I had to quit. So me staying as mod did not do me any favors and certainly not you guys. However since getting my own site all the pressure is gone. I feel relaxed again. I feel like I did years ago when HD started. Peaceful. Back to my older self. Working every day with friends like I used to at HD to improve the place in any way we can. It's what has been missing for so long. I do apologize but O guess after so many it falls on deaf ears. I just wish I would have quit ages ago. I mean in April 2011 when I first tried killing myself and went to a mental ward. Despite having a little troll that tried his best at giving me a heart attack(a heart that is only at 17% working) I still feel so rejuvenated at GEN2GEN. Yama is a member and many Dojo goers. I hope to see more. Not like asking ya to leave SD. Not in the least. In any case mock me hate me post pictures of my face on a the fattest person you can find. I don;t care. Maybe I'm the fat dude from blade. But I got big tits. I didn't even need surgery for these babies!


Last like I said on my forums. I can;t tell you how long the past 2 years have been for me and my family. The paperwork,the doctors,the mental and physical strain on all of us,the visits to workfroce services and social security offices and phone calls. It worked out. The Judge viewed the records today to prepare for the hearing on September 4th. He cancelled the hearing. Evidence was too strong and awarded me disability. So in a zen like moment.

For those who read this thanks. For those who tl:dr go fuck yourself Adam. That's cool. But soon I can say I'm RICH BIATCH!
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Re: I win I lose I win you win. I'm not Dave Chappelle

Postby Kenny » Wed Aug 29, 2012 1:38 pm

Well first off I want to say congratulations on getting your disability and having things go well at your own place. It sounds like you're getting things on the right track.

But i'm still standing by what I said previously. About how you moderated and how you treated people here. You can blame on anything and everything, but they were your actions in the end. With me, it shouldn't come to a surprise. I was making the hints very obvious toward the end. However, I did mean it when I said I wouldn't mind you posting around as a regular member. Give it some time and as long as everyone is in good spirits, it'll be alright.

I'm still not interested in joining your forums at this time but I do wish you the best of luck in growing a community there.
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Re: I win I lose I win you win. I'm not Dave Chappelle

Postby MiTT3NZ » Wed Aug 29, 2012 1:54 pm

Reminds me of Business...

"The most hated on out of all of those who say they get hated on and exaggerate it all in eighty thousand songs so much they make it all up, there's no such thing."

You're not hated, you just pissed everyone off and there's no escaping the fact that it was you who did it. If I go on some rant about how someone should shut the fuck up complainin about bein raped and I'm glad they miscarried, I can't just blame it on bein pissed, you gotta take responsibility.

You threw your toys out of the pram, and didn't understand that little barely unnoticable tweaks you made to the forum, or shit you may have orchestrated "behind the scenes" doesn't cancel out how much of an absolute cunt you were.

What makes it even worse is the fact that you're takin such an innocent stance on it all, and claimin that people hate you. Stop with the fuckin sympathy card shit and grow a pair. You didn't even need to make this topic. I'm an egotistical twat, but you're so vain it's a joke.

You need to realise that people don't care enough for you to be the focal point for every conversation here. Yeah, you're the butt of every joke at the moment, and it may take another month or so for peeps to finish gettin shit of their chest, but they're the consequences of your actions.

Get over yourself, and come back when you're ready to be a man.
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Re: I win I lose I win you win. I'm not Dave Chappelle

Postby Bluecast » Wed Aug 29, 2012 2:08 pm

:lol: Mitts I did take blame read agin. I should have quit earlier and my own problems led me to do no on any favors. Relax mitts. I was owning up to it. Maybe I didn't say it properly. But what the situation was I handled it poorly. I am not blaming anyone. I blame myself how I handled it is what I'm trying to say. No need for a drama post yellow one. :P I'm really just hear to say I made my mistakes. I also was here to say our hard work paid off. The suffering paid off. In a literal and figurative sense.

Also Mitts balls the slightest tap hurts them. A pussy now that thing can take a pounding. I'm a proud being a pussy as I have taken many poundings. I also have balls as they keep getting wacked so it hurts.
Last edited by Bluecast on Wed Aug 29, 2012 2:10 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: I win I lose I win you win. I'm not Dave Chappelle

Postby QWERTY » Wed Aug 29, 2012 2:09 pm

Well I can't say this thread doesn't have a sense of inevitability about it, I just didn't think it would be so soon. You can bang on all you want about how you were having trouble and all that shit but when push comes to shove you were acting a dick for a long, long time. I've noticed you're still up to your usual self of deleting posts or threads which paint you in a bad light over at GEN2GEN. I've noticed this post of yours is no longer there:

Fuck-em (Shenmue Dojo). I just want my account deleted there. I just want nothing to do with it ever again. I may make a new one at some point to PM Bambi about the trade and Henry to pay him shipping for those coins. Other than that fuck SD. I love Yama but SD Done with it. I lurked last night and just see some backstabbing lying cunts. Saying whatever they can even lies. Seriously just delete all my posts & account. It's as likely I go back there as it is for Sony to make hardware for Nintendo again.


You can't deny what you've been doing for such a long time, dude. Editing and deleting other people's posts is a major wrongdoing as far as I and a lot of others on this board are concerned. It's ok for you to maybe edit your post if the need was necessary but you were doing it to make others look stupid, and you still haven't apologised. Like I said in my first post when I came back after you said goodbye (forever!), I don't hate you, but you're a fucking headcase.
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Re: I win I lose I win you win. I'm not Dave Chappelle

Postby Bluecast » Wed Aug 29, 2012 2:12 pm

You like to post things out of context when emotions were high. Don't ya mr posting goatsee all over my site :lol:

Yes I know it was you. You done that before and you seem to have this thing for being a guest at my place all the time and quoting the same quote over and over. Look I did not come here to go on about what hapened happened. i came here to say I fucked up but also I got on disability.(and I plan to buy some things for some people who helped out a year ago)
:)
Last edited by Bluecast on Wed Aug 29, 2012 2:16 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: I win I lose I win you win. I'm not Dave Chappelle

Postby QWERTY » Wed Aug 29, 2012 2:16 pm

Bluecast wrote:You like to post things out of context when emotions were high. Don't ya mr posting goatsee all over my site :lol:

Yes I know it was you. You done that before and you seem to have this thing for being a guest at my place all the time and quoting the same quote over and over. Look I did not come here to go on about what hapened happened. i came here to say I fucked up but also I got on disability.(and I plan to buy some things for some people who helped out a year ago) :)


Don't start making up shit. I saw you post that today and I know that it was aimed in my direction. Yes, I have visited your site, to see how things are going, but not once have I registered and spammed goatse or scat porn. Everyone now knows you are untrustworthy and you have a habit of making shit up to paint other people as cunts. You can cross reference my IP if you want but I can assure you that it was not my doing, if it happened at all, that is.
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Re: I win I lose I win you win. I'm not Dave Chappelle

Postby Bluecast » Wed Aug 29, 2012 2:18 pm

"Yes I know it was you. You done that before and you seem to have this thing for being a guest at my place all the time and quoting the same quote over and over. Look I did not come here to go on about what hapened happened. i came here to say I fucked up but also I got on disability.(and I plan to buy some things for some people who helped out a year ago)"

Also QWERTY. I have Sonikku as a witness to what was posted. Again this is not about drama. I was trying to be nice and your making it hard buddy. This NOT about what was what. Please don;t start attacking the topic just because you hate me and think you have free reign. Still friends with Yama. So not trying to being up bad blood so please don;t make it into Aurburn vs Alabama
Last edited by Bluecast on Wed Aug 29, 2012 2:20 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: I win I lose I win you win. I'm not Dave Chappelle

Postby MiTT3NZ » Wed Aug 29, 2012 2:19 pm

That's not a real apology though. All you've done is play the sympathy card, felt sorry for yourself, and threw a random apology in halfway through (which, again, played the sympathy card)

Here's a summary of your post:

"Everybody hates me, but back in the day, everyone loved me. In fact, I was so loved that I felt I needed to stay in order to keep this place active, because it's my popularity that got everyone to post. I should've quit when I tried killin myself. I blame everything on that. I know everyone hates me, and that nobody's going to listen to me, but I apologise. On the plus side, my health situation's getting better, and I'd like it if you joined my website, but I want you to stay here too."

Doesn't read like an apology, does it? Sounds like someone who doesn't feel they were in the wrong is saying sorry because they feel it necessary for everyone to be cool with them again, all the while coming up with excuses and blaming it on other shit.
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Re: I win I lose I win you win. I'm not Dave Chappelle

Postby QWERTY » Wed Aug 29, 2012 2:20 pm

Bluecast wrote:Also QWERTY. I have Sonikku as a witness to what was posted. Again this is not about drama. I was trying to be nice and yoru making it hard buddy.


Well if it did happen then you fail to remember that you have made a lot of enemies on here in your time as a mod/admin and posting that kinda shit isn't limited to just me.
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Re: I win I lose I win you win. I'm not Dave Chappelle

Postby Bluecast » Wed Aug 29, 2012 2:27 pm

Ok I see emotions are still high.


Ok Mittens please listen. I did not plan to post today. I only posted because I FUCKING WON DISABILITY! I'm HAPPY AS SHIT AND NOTHING CAN BRING ME DOWN AS THIS WAS THE HARDEST THING EVER IN MY LIFE AND I WON AND GETTING RICH...for my standards!! In the process I just wanted to say what happened. I am NOT trying to play any sympathy. I just wanted to say how it truly happened and that because of what happened I handled piss poor and it's my fault. Ok Health and situation aside. I messed up. But that's not what this is about. This was about me saying I fucked up and I see to you I fucked up in how I said I fucked up. Sorry man :lol: I can.t win. Damned if I do and Damned if I don't. No agin not playing sympathy. tear me apart if you want but the effort and thought it there. I want to buy you something and Kenny and others from those who helped me october last year. But your making it hard for me. Sorry I'm just so happy I have no train of thought. Just please know I'm just trying to make it up and even if how I said it even here is fucked up. That's all I'm trying to do.
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Re: I win I lose I win you win. I'm not Dave Chappelle

Postby Martin » Wed Aug 29, 2012 2:32 pm

Good luck with whatever illness you have. But yeah, your actions in your time as Dojo commander will never be forgotten. Worst moderator ever.

Does is anger you to see that I'm unbanned, and there's nothing you can do about it? :lol:
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Re: I win I lose I win you win. I'm not Dave Chappelle

Postby Bluecast » Wed Aug 29, 2012 2:34 pm

Nope. I don't even care. In fact I could not be happier. Too much stress and pressure. Best thing I ever did was quit. Like no longer having elephantiasis on your scrotum relief. :D
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Re: I win I lose I win you win. I'm not Dave Chappelle

Postby MiTT3NZ » Wed Aug 29, 2012 2:35 pm

I'm happy for you gettin your disability benefits. Truly, I am. Just make sure it goes on real shit and not ultimate collectors editions of games. And I'd much rather you save that money you plan on spending on any of us and spend it on your mam instead.
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Re: I win I lose I win you win. I'm not Dave Chappelle

Postby ys » Wed Aug 29, 2012 2:39 pm

I didn't get overly involved so I didn't talk shit but just stayed out of it since others were much more involved in the case. If we forget about the forum issues for a while, you're also one of the members from the early Shenmue-community days which indeed counts for something maybe. During your "non-stressed out" periods you were one of the people keeping things active by posting etc.

And I can imagine that the news you got takes a lot of weight off your shoulders.
Warning : boring summary following to make a point ;)

Now I'm not in a situation AS bad but paperwork for absence from work due to health issues. Today everything got messed up again (wrong appointment made by others, drove to the right place, had to park 2km away due to road work, they didn't get all papers from the first people, walked back, drove to the first place again, they didn't recognize the forms etc.). So it forced me to invent some backup plan while they try to sort things out.
This will probably also mess up a course that I wanted to take due to conflicting schedules. And besides that there was another case hanging for about a year. At the same time I was solving an issue where I used to live (Sweden) regarding university applications. But they lost forms I sent, forgot about my case etc. but...I'm not lashing out at others here for it ;)

The point that I want to make is that many people have a lot of stuff to deal with in their lives. Again, not as bad always as your heart problems. But still it would be messed up if everyone here started going berserk and mention later that it's due to personal problems, you know? I'm not judging but it's better to maybe fix things first or just lurk if real life seriously gets in the way?

Oh, and I didn't join your forums but read a bit now and then. Nothing personal but I'm very busy these days and restrict myself by not registering at an extra place.

PS I didn't know yet that Martin was back. Just saw it now, late as usual I assume? :P
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